"Zombies in Plain English"

This Halloween, don't expect the cutesy kids walking around asking for candy. This Halloween, expect dum dum duuuuummmmmmm, zombie attacks.

"This Halloween is foretasted to have high zombie attacks," Lee "living dead" LeFever said. He does comfort us by saying, "We're here to help you survive."

The first thing you need to do is identify the zombie. Zombies should be easy to detect as they will have an unnatural face with there body be twisted into different shapes.

Their skin is also gray and they will have red eyes.

There will be pretenders dressed up as zombies this Halloween. LeFever states that if they eat candy and/or are dancing with Micheal Jackson, then they are not a zombie.

Most people brains have two responses when they see a threatening things coming at them. Fight or Flight.

If your of the flight variety, make sure to run to a Costco instead of a business building or your home. This is mainly due to having enough resources at hand.

If your of the going down swinging type of person, make sure to know what zombies can and can't do.

Zombies are surprisingly fast so don't under estimate them. Also, if you live in the colder part of the world, zombies are slowed down by the cold.

Now, the final step to the fight is killing the zombies.

Anyway that you can take the head off of the zombie will always be your best option.

LeFever suggests Large caliber bullets and then go in for the decapitation of the head with either a machete, a chain-saw or an ax.

He puts emphasis on being careful when using napalm because a zombie that is on fire is just as dangerous as a zombie that isn't on fire.

For more tips on how to survive, check out these sites.

http://www.mahalo.com/how-to-survive-a-zombie-attack
http://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=zombies+in+plain+english&search_type=&aq=0&oq=zombies+in+pla